tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7703913.post3823442275604846492..comments2023-10-02T04:41:34.722-04:00Comments on Marry in Massachusetts: Failure of Generationsmassmarrierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02358207247771711952noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7703913.post-5466345569117536722007-03-13T09:39:00.000-04:002007-03-13T09:39:00.000-04:00Both are commendable -- that you are loyal to your...Both are commendable -- that you are loyal to your only and that your egalitarianism and social responsibility transfer well. Alas, there are reasons for many generalizations and clichés, and why so many psychologists and sociologists study and report on birth order-related traits.<BR/><BR/>Would that more parents had your attitude.massmarrierhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02358207247771711952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7703913.post-72701200871033214652007-03-12T18:36:00.000-04:002007-03-12T18:36:00.000-04:00Comments: Gay and Boomer can mean the closet has a...Comments: Gay and Boomer can mean the closet has as much comfort as discomfort, rather like chicken pot pies: bad for you and good for you all at once. And being closeted can mean doing no more than you must even for such a cause, lest you stand out too much. It's a reflex. <BR/><BR/>Not every Boomer has sat on their hands. I draw some of my slim commitment from two of my closest college friends. In the week of Stonewall they not only came out, but came out as a couple. (Ryan, I wonder if you can imagine the courage that took in NH nearly 40 years ago.) AIDS took them both long ago, but I cannot forget them. They were Tom Joslin and Mark Massi, and the film they made of their dying is still circulating.<BR/><BR/>MM, it's not the first time I've raised a friendly caution about generalisation. As you know, my daughter is an only child. I could wish I had had her breadth of mind at her age, and I wish I'd been doing something half as useful. I'm vain enough to think I did a decent job of parenting not because we brought her up with an overdose of amour propre, but because we successfully brought her up to be a decent and considerate human being. (Yes, how rare these days.)<BR/><BR/>It is not the fact of being only or first born, but how the parents treat that fact, that matters. Incite your child to believe the world is her/his oyster and they grow up with arrogance. Or, let them see that the world is a very big place, that they have only a right to try and fail in it, to make mistakes, own them and move on. Encourage them not to hold their own talents above those of others, but to use what they have to make a better world.<BR/><BR/>There are a good many other things I could mention that make a good human being out of a first or only child. Most of them must come from the intent of the parents. I imagine that purpose was lacking in the cases you mention.<BR/><BR/>Finally, I fear I would make a nuisance of myself if I were sitting at table with the individual you mentioned. The opportunities for sly humour would be too tempting to resist.Unclehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17576979900477102398noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7703913.post-66385419021709921792007-03-12T16:00:00.000-04:002007-03-12T16:00:00.000-04:00Well, from what this Boomer saw, the closet was a ...Well, from what this Boomer saw, the closet was a huge factor. That is a tremendous advantage for people in their teens through their thirties now. They surely know homosexual men and women, boys and girls.<BR/><BR/>I knew of gay men growing up and in Virginia as a child I was aware of numerous Boston Marriages of lesbians, but all were closeted. However, the first openly gay people I met -- those who would say they were homosexuals and publicly be with their partners -- were in Manhattan, mostly Greenwich Village. It was four decades ago, but back then, most of the men who outed themselves also affected the mincing movements and exaggerated speech, a la <I>La Cage aux Folles</I> or <I>The Boys in the Band</I>. <BR/><BR/>Unquestionably, it has been great for society -- gay, straight, asexual, whatever -- for homosexuals to come out. That not only builds on itself, but it makes it plain to everyone that there are homosexual men and women in all places and professions. People your age can grow up accepting that and starting from that point, even if unaware how difficult it was in the middle of the last century and before.<BR/><BR/>The struggles are at a higher level for many oppressed groups. It is a reason for considerable hope.massmarrierhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02358207247771711952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7703913.post-19806416062395810862007-03-12T15:41:00.000-04:002007-03-12T15:41:00.000-04:00Why the baby boomers never truly got on board with...Why the baby boomers never truly got on board with gay rights, I don't know. (It's not too late, though.) Maybe it was the influence of religion; maybe it was just too foriegn a subject. <BR/><BR/>Maybe we can't blame the boomer generation for not doing enough because what it means to be gay is different now. I hear a lot of people talk about how being gay was, in some ways, more accepted back then because most people who were gay were completely in the closet. No one cared about it until gay people wanted to assert their own rights, which didn't happen for a long time after. <BR/><BR/>Maybe you should do a lot of digging and write a book on this subject, because it's fascinating and goodness knows there's enough material. LOL.Ryanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04523572927796479670noreply@blogger.com